Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.