I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
