she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
