Barsexuality is the new black.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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