it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
