What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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