I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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