last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
