you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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