Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
This toilet bowl is my home.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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