Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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