Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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