U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
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