Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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