so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
