lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
