he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
