Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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