Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
