You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
