What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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