we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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