do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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