im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
i think my cat just said my name.
We are all done wearing pants today
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