We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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