i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Randomize
