Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Screwed.edu
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
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