Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
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