he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
