I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
