If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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