I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Randomize