I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
