A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
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