am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
