You really coming over, don't trick.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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