Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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