How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Randomize
