we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I would fuck him just for his dog
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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