I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
