Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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