porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
this just has baby written all over it
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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