That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
