Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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