I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I am available for nakedness
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize