Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
