You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
