they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
