I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize