then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
