what day is it and did you see me today?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
